It hurts, though. Every time I think about how you will never love me. I've bent over backwards, and it's for nothing. It's for you jerk off too, and then I'm forgotten.
I don't forget you. I think about you. Some days not very much. Some days, all the time. I wonder where you are and what you are doing. I wonder if you are eating and sleeping well.
I wonder if you're with her.
It goes away. The thoughts go away, and the sadness. Then, something reminds me of you, and I am consumed.
I would do anything.
Of course I would, but the person I love most. But we've never met, how can anyone have those feelings.
Well, consider this. I love Keanu Reeves (not his movies, just him) but we've never met. We've never talked! I am as far separated from Keanu as one can possibly be.
But I would defend him. I would fight for his honor. I don't know Keanu Reeves but I know he is a person worth loving. Just as I know you are a person worth loving.
Why won't you tell me? Why won't you tell me what is wrong with, what is unloveable. I want to know. I won't change anything, because I am happy with who I am, big fucking mouth and all.
Do you know why I love you?
- You're smart
- You're talented
- You can be funny, when you show me that side
- You're loyal
- You're dedicated
- You're passionate
- You're a good person
And I know all of these things from words. Just words. Still, I am not enough. You are busy, you say. Yet, this is the most low key situation you could have. Text is fine... but I want to hear your voice. I want to see you, your face, the expressions that you make.
I can't wait forever. God, I wish I could, but that can't happen. That isn't fair.
All I want from you is time and love. That's it. Why are those the two things you refuse to give me?